TRICK OR TREAT! [treat].

hi friends!

did youse all dress up for halloween?  we did!  we went as Wednesday Addams and a dead prostitute.  see?

cute huh.

aaaaaanyway.  aside from slutty costumes and fake blood, halloween is all about candy and pumpkins.  so… we made pumpkin pie!  how is THAT for a segue.

first, get one and a half butternut pumpkins (you need to end up with just over 2 cups of mashed pumpkin) and take out the seeds and gunk and cut them into large chunks/cubes and sprinkle them with ground cinnamon/ cloves/ nutmeg/ ginger and drizzle with maple syrup.  cover the baking tray with foil and bake for an hour or two on 200C or until its super soft so that you can fork it.  when cooked, put all the flesh into a processor and whiz until smooth.  then squish it through a sieve so there’s no lumps.  add more of the spices to taste and then let that shit cool down.

then, make the vanilla shortcrust pastry.  just whiz 1 1/3 cups plain flour, 1 tablespoon caster sugar and 1/4 teaspoon baking powder in a food processor.  then chuck in 180g of REALLY cold unsalted butter (chopped into cubes) and whiz until it resembles fine breadcrumbs or small pea sized balls.  then gradually add 1/3 cup iced water and a teaspoon vanilla extract while it’s whizzing until it forms a smooth dough.  take it out, shape it into a ball then flatten into a disk, wrap in glad and put it into the fridge for halfers.

roll out the pastry, and line a greased pie tin (the ones with the removable bottom duh) and back into the fridge for another halfers.  blind bake it for 15-20 mins on 200C (dudes: GOOGLE IT) and then take it out to cool.

for the pumpkin filling, briefly beat or whisk three eggs and 1/2 cup brown sugar, then add the pumpkin moosh and half a cup of thickened cream.  pour into the pie shell, and bake for 45mins to an hour until it’s firm to touch and a knife comes out nearly clean.  cool it on a wire rack to room temp.

serve with a faggy dusting of icing sugar, a generous slurp of maple syrup (the real stuff, don’t fuck around) and a dollop of whipped cream.

happy halloween/thanksgiving/whatever occasion it is when yanks make pumpkin pie.

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